- YINI I-ABUSE? -

"Ubugebengu obudlova kakhulu emhlabeni"

Ukuhlukunyezwa, okwenzeka kwesinye noma ngaphezulu kwezenzo ezilandelayo phakathi komndeni noma amalungu omndeni: (a) ukuzama noma ukulimaza ngokomzimba; (b) ukubeka omunye ngokwesaba ukulimala okungokomzimba okusemandleni; (c) okwenza omunye ahlanganyele ngokuzibandakanya ebuhlotsheni bobulili ngamandla, usongo noma obunzima.

Ukuhlukunyezwa kungaba ngokomzimba, ngokomzwelo, ngokobulili nangokwezimali. Yonke imizuzwana eyisishiyagalolunye owesifazane uhlaselwa e-United States. Ingxenye eyodwa yabo bonke abantu abangenamakhaya babalekela ubudlova basekhaya. Ingxenye yesithathu yabesifazane ihlukunyezwa ngokomzimba ngesikhathi sokukhulelwa. Udlame lwasekhaya lungenye yezinto ezibangela ukulimala ezinganeni ezingakazalwa. Ukubheja kuvame ukwanda futhi kube nobudlova ngaphezulu kwesikhathi. Amaphesenti angaphezu kuka-50 kubo bonke abesifazane ababulewe bafa ngenxa yobudlova basekhaya.

Imibuzo ejwayelekile ukubuzwa


Yiziphi izenzo ezivamile zokuhlukunyezwa?


Okunye ukusabela okuvamile kokuhlukunyezwa kubandakanya ukuhlukumeza izidakamizwa, ubunzima ukukhumbula izinto, ubunzima ukwenza izinqumo, ukudideka nokuphazamiseka kwesikhathi. Okunye ukuphendula kufaka phakathi imicabango eminingi efika ngesikhathi esisodwa, i-back back; ukuphindaphinda okwenzeka njalo; ngizizwa nginzima; uzizwe ungasebenzi kahle; uzizwe uphelelwe amandla; i-nightmares; ukukhathala, izinhlungu zesisu, izinkinga zesisu, isizungu, izinhlungu zesifuba, ukusabela okuphazamisayo, ukulahlekelwa ukholo nokwethemba. Abesifazane abaningi abahlukumezekile baye bahlukanisa nabangane babo ngoba umshayeli akavumelanga ukuvakashela. Abashayeli bezimbuzi bafuna izisulu zizizwe zingenakukwazi ukwenza amandla angaphezu kwazo. Ngezinye izikhathi sonke isisulu esidinga ukukwenza ukuze izimpawu zinyamalale ukuphunyuka ku-batterer. Ngezinye izikhathi izimpawu ziphela uma umsindisi ezwa ephephile. Ngezinye izikhathi, lo muntu ophunyukayo angadinga usizo olwengeziwe ngokutholwa kwawo njengokwelapha.\ Uma izimpawu ziqhubeka isikhathi eside, izimpawu zingaba uhlobo lokugula kwengqondo. "Ukugula ngengqondo akuyona ubugebengu futhi kukhona manje imithetho edingekayo yomthetho wezempilo yengqondo okufanele ihlangane ngaphambi kokuba umuntu angene esibhedlela ngokungenasidingo. Ukugula kwengqondo kuthiwa ngokomthetho ngokuthi, "isifo esibucayi sokucabanga nokuzizwa komzwelo, ukunakekelwa noma ukukhumbula okuhlukumeza kakhulu isahlulelo, ukuziphatha, ikhono lokubona okwangempela ukuhlangabezana nezidingo ezivamile zokuphila kodwa akufanele kuhlanganise nokudakwa ngokweqile. Bheka i-Massachusetts Code 30 1 (a). I-Down and Out. I-Manual on Basic Basic and Benefits kubantu abangenamakhaya eMassachusetts 1997, iphe. 29 Incwadi yeMassachusetts Coalition ye-Homeless




Yazi izimpawu zokuhlukunyezwa futhi ubone udokotela wakho ngasese.


Abahlinzeki bezinsizakalo, ikakhulukazi abasebenzi bezokwelapha, kungenzeka ukuthi yibo kuphela abangaphandle ukuxhumana nowesifazane oshaywe okhubazekile. Ngakho-ke, uma kunikezwa izinsizakalo zabesifazane abakhubazekile, kubalulekile ukwazi ukuthi ukukhubazeka kowesifazane kuyini nokuthi iziphi izimpawu zomzimba ezingase zihlotshaniswe nakho. Ngezinye izikhathi abantu bacabanga ukuthi inkinga yangokomzimba ibangelwa ukukhubazeka uma empeleni ukubheja kubangela. "Uma owesifazane onesifo sokukhubazeka enemivimbo yakhe, tshela noma ubani onayo ukuthi udinga ubumfihlo nesiguli sakho bese ubuza isiguli uma imbangela ivela." USUSAN ROBINSON MD UMNYANGO WABANTU ABANYE NOMUNTU




Abesifazane abakhubazekile babhekana nezinhlobo ezahlukene zabenzi bokuhlukumeza nokuhlukunyezwa.


Udlame lwasekhaya luvame ukubonakala njengodlame lomzimba kuphela. Kodwa-ke, udlame lomzimba lungenye yezindlela ezisetshenziselwa abahlukumezi ukulawula abalingani babo, ngakho-ke, kungenye yezingozi ezithintekayo abesifazane kanye nezingane zabo ezibhekene nazo. Ukuziphatha kwe-batterer kungabangela ubungozi ezinganeni, ukulimala kwengqondo, ukulahlekelwa kwezindlu, ukunakekelwa kwezempilo, umsebenzi, noma izinga lokuphila lamanje. Ngaphezu kwalokho, abanye abesifazane abahlaselayo bangase bangaboni ukuthi ubudlova obungokwenyama buyingozi enkulu. Owesifazane oshaywayo uzobhekana nezinselele ezilodwa uma ehlala ebuhlotsheni kanye nesethi ehlukile uma ehamba. Abesifazane abashaywayo bayingozi kakhulu yokufa lapho behlela ukuhamba. Yingakho uhlelo lokuphepha oluyimfihlo lubaluleke kakhulu. Kunezinhlobo eziningi ezifanayo zokuhlukunyezwa ngazo zonke abesifazane abahlaselayo ababhekana nazo. Noma kunjalo, abesifazane abakhubazekile babhekene nezingozi ezingeziwe. "Ngokwesibonelo, ukuthatha umuntu esihlalweni sabakhubazekile endaweni ethile abangafuni ukuya kuyo kungafaniswa nokuthumba. Ukususa ibhethri esihlalweni samasondo kagesi kungafana nokuvala othile ekamelweni. Ukususa irempu ephathekayo ekhaya labo kungafana nokuzikhiya / usendlini. Uma isisulu singasithulu, sithatha noma siphule i-TDD yakhe kufana nokukhipha ifoni. "-1 Omunye umehluko ekuhlukumezweni phakathi kwabantu abakhubazekile nabantu abangenalo ukuthi labo abakhubazekile banezinhlobo eziningi zabantu abangaba ngabenzi bokuhlukumeza. Isibonelo, ezinye izikhonzi zokunakekelwa komuntu siqu zenze izenzo ezimbi zokuhlukunyezwa kulabo abakhubazekile. Ochwepheshe, abasebenza nabantu abakhubazekile, banelungelo lokubika zonke izigameko zokuhlukunyezwa kwabantu abakhubazekile kuKhomishini Yokuvikelwa Kwabantu abakhubazekile. 1 - Ukuziphatha ngokocansi kanye nokukhubazeka Vol. 9 No.3 "Ukuphunyuka ekuhlukunyezweni: Izinkinga ezihlukile kwabesifazane abakhubazekile" p. 276 Chris Womendez ubaba uKaren Schneiderman




INGABE ukuhlukunyezwa komdala nokuhlukunyezwa kwabantu abakhubazekile okufanayo?


Isahluko 19A Izigaba 14-26 zikaMassachusetts Law zichaza ukuhlukunyezwa komdala njengezenzo noma ukushiyeka okubangelwa ukulimala ngokomzimba, ngokocansi noma ngokomzwelo, noma ukulahlekelwa ngokwezimali kumdala. Ngakho-ke, ukuhlukunyezwa komdala kuhlanganisa: ukuhlukunyezwa ngokomzimba, ukuxhashazwa ngokocansi, ukuhlukunyezwa ngokomzwelo, ukunganakwa ngokweqile, nokuxhaphazwa ngokwezimali. Izimpawu zokuhlukunyezwa ngokomzimba kubantu asebekhulile zifana nalabo abakhubazekile. Izimpawu zokuhlukumeza zihlanganisa, kepha azikhawulelwanga, iziqhumane, amehlo omnyama, ama-welts, amazinyo alahlekile, ama-lacerations kanye namamaki endophi; izimpawu zomzimba zokujeziswa noma ukuvinjelwa; ukwenqaba umnakekeli ukuvumela abanye ukuba bavakashele umdala kuphela kanye nokuthola i-laboratory okungaphezulu noma ngaphansi kokwelashwa. -1 Ukuhlukunyezwa kumele kubikwe kwi-Elder Affairs 1-800-922-2275. Uma kuqinisekiswa, umsizi wesikhungo sokuvikela uzohlinzeka umdala ukhetho lwezinsizakalo ezenzelwe ukunciphisa noma ukuqeda ukuhlukunyezwa. Amalungelo omdala nezifiso zakhe zihlonishwa njalo uma zikwazi. EZINYE IZIKHONO ZOKUSEBENZA KWE-ELDER ABUSE: Ukuvuthwa, amazinyo, ama-punctures, ama-mark, ama-punctures, ama-puncture, ama-puncture, ama-puncture, ama-puncture, ama-puncture, ama-puncture, ama-puncture, ama-puncture njll, abangane abasha ababonisa uthando, nokwesaba abathandekayo. Iphethini lokulimala njenge-elbow bruising ingabangela ukuwa. Ingabe incazelo ichaza ukulimala? Ingabe ukulimala kuvamile? Abahlukumezi bangaba yilokho noma ngaphezulu kulezi zinhlobo ezinhlanu ezilandelayo: I.) okuhloswe kahle 2.) ahluleki 3.) i-narcissistic 4.) ukuhlukunyezwa 5.) ubuhlungu 1 - Ukuqaphela nokuphendula ukuhlukunyezwa kukaH Holly Ramsay Kiawanik PHD




Ngezinye izikhathi abaNakekeli bokuNakekelwa ngabanye ngeziphambeko.


Uma uMsizi Wokunakekela Ubuntu (i-"PCA") engeyena umhlukumezi, ungacela i-PCA ukuthi ithole usizo lokubalekela kumhlukumezi. Mhlawumbe angabiza amaphoyisa noma abize enye yemithombo efinyelelekayo ekuqaleni kohlu lwamithombo. Kukhona ama-PCA amaningi awaziyo futhi ahlekisayo abasiza abantu abanenkinga ngamakhono abo amakhono enjenge-buttoning noma ekudleni. Noma kunjalo, abanye kule nsimu baye bahlambalaza kakhulu. Ngakho-ke, kubalulekile ukuhlola okubhekiselweyo nokwenza ukuhlolwa kwesizinda sobugebengu se-PCA ngesikhathi sokuqasha. Lezi zingxenye ze-PCA zingase zibe nenjongo kodwa zingabi nabubele futhi ziphule amathambo omuntu okhonzwa yilezi zimbi. Uma umhlukumezi kuyi-PCA, noma ekhokhela i-PCA, noma enobungane kakhulu ne-PCA, ungatshele i-PCA noma yini. I-PCA ehlukumezayo ingahle ibonakale ngokuwa kwenye yezinhlobo ezilandelayo: I. enganele 2. egocentric 3. ukuhlukunyezwa 4. unonya ngenhloso yokwenza umonakalo Abantu abakhubazekile banelungelo lekhwalithi engcono kakhulu yokuphila. Lokhu kuhlanganisa ukuphepha, ubumfihlo, nokuvikeleka. Lokhu kusho futhi inkululeko yokuxhumana nokuziphatha konke njengemisebenzi ngokukhululekile, ngaphandle kokwesaba ukuvinjelwa, ukuphoqeleka, noma ukuhlukunyezwa ngokomzimba, ngokocansi noma ngokomzwelo. Novemba 1 997 Ifomu lokuthola ulwazi elilungiselelwe yiKhomishana yokuPhepha lokuPhepha kwabasebenzi abakhubazekile (DP PC) kanye neBoston Centre for Independent Living (BCIL)




Ukuhlukumezeka kwabalingani bobulili obufanayo kungaba nzima nakakhulu uma isivakashi nomenzi wobugebengu bobabili bekhubazekile.


Uma udlame lwasekhaya lwenzeka ngaphakathi kobudlelwane obufanayo bobulili kungase kube nezinkinga ezengeziwe umuntu angabhekana nazo. Ngokwesibonelo, iphoyisa elibizwa lingase lingamazi ukuthi ubani okufanele aphendule ngokuhlukunyezwa. Ngesinye isikhathi ijaji angeke likwazi ukunquma ukuthi ubani onecala futhi linganikeza ukubuyisana komuntu ngamunye. Kungaba nzima kakhudlwana umhlinzeki kanye nesisulu uma umuntu ohlukumeziwe ekhulu kunesisindo kunomenzi wobugebengu kanye / noma uma kokubili izifo ezingapheli noma ukukhubazeka. U-Eiesha nomlingani wakhe babengazi ukuthi basesiteji sesithathu sesifo seqhwa kuze kube yilapho indodana yabo ithola ukuthi inesifo sengculazi. Iningi lememori ka-Eisha lanyamalala futhi ngezinye izikhathi wayebuthakathaka kakhulu kangangokuthi wayengenakuvula isiqandisini ukuba sondle umndeni. Umlingani womlingani wakhe u-Eisha wayelokhu ehlukumeza, njengoba bobabili babe besengozini enkulu. Lapho omakhelwane bezwa u-Eiesha ekhala, babiza amaphoyisa. Bobabili babethi bayaphathwa kabi. U-Eiesha nendodana yakhe baphephile manje, futhi bobabili bathola ukwelashwa okudingekayo. Baye bahlala endlini exhaswe eduze nabachwepheshe bezokwelapha abaphatha isifo seqhwa ngokusebenzisa imithi. **** UMichelle wayenesifo sikashukela futhi walahlekelwa imilenze yomabili kanye neminwe yakhe emibili. Wabuye waba nezifo eziningana ezingapheli ezihlanganisa i-disc herniated ne-asthma. Ngesikhathi esephuma esibhedlela kusukela ekuqothulweni, waphindela emuva ku-batterer wakhe ngoba wacabanga ukuthi akusikho indawo okumele ahambe kuyo. Umlingani kaMichelle wamphatha kabi kakhulu kunalokho ayekwenzile ngaphambili. Wondliwe kancane. UMichelle wayenamandla kakhulu ekudambiseni amanzi futhi engondleki kahle ngakho umshayeli wakhe akazange ahlukumeze ukuvala umnyango. Ngalesisikhathi uMichelle waphuma futhi wahamba waya emgwaqeni ukuyobeka imoto phansi. Wathathwa futhi wagijimela ku-Emergency Medical Service engamniki igama langempela kunoma ubani. Wahlala esibhedlela izinyanga ezinhlanu waze waphila ngokugcwele. Esikhundleni sokubuyela emuva ku-batterer wabiza i-411 yindawo yokuhlala yokulala yabesifazane. U-411 opharetha wolwazi wamtshela kuFinex House. Uya emaqenjini okusekela, nemihlangano yokuzihlonipha. Kwesinye isigaba sokusekela kuFinex House uMichelle wahlangana nomuntu owayengumfazi ohlukunyeziwe ovuselele impilo yakhe enkampanini yaseMelika futhi wakhetha ukuba umeluleki kuMichelle futhi amsize ekutholeni umsebenzi.




Kuyini ukudlwengula kwentsha esemusha?


Udlame lwasekhaya lwenzeka ebuhlotsheni obusha kanye nezinye ubudlelwane obuseduze. Abashadile abakhubazekile basengozini kakhulu futhi banokuzithoba okukhulu - imbewu edingekayo ekuhlukunyezweni ukuqhubeka. Omunye wabesifazane abathathu namantombazane uthola ubudlova ebuhlotsheni babo obuseduze. Lesi sibalo siphezulu phakathi kwentsha ekhubazekile kepha ukuhlaselwa okunjalo kuyabika. Umonakalo omkhulu wokuhlukunyezwa kwezingane ngokocansi ngubaba ophilayo noma omunye umuntu omdala owaziwayo emndenini. Ukunaka ubudlelwane obubuntwaneni nokukhula kwasekuqaleni kubaluleke kakhulu ngoba abenzi bokubi bangase bangabi namalungu omndeni. Ngaphezu kwalokho, unyaka ngamunye kunezibalo eziningi zokufa ezibangelwa ukuhlukunyezwa kwentsha eMassachusetts lapho izisulu zithatha ukuqeda ubuhlobo bazo. "I-Massachusetts Society ye-Prevention of Cruelty to Children ihlinzeka ngezinhlelo zokuvimbela ukuhlukumeza ngokocansi ngebanga lesi-12." Ngomhla ka-25 Meyi 2000 kuBoston Globe




Ubudlova nokudlwengulwa - ngumnakekeli, indoda, isoka noma usuku - luphikisana nomthetho.


Ungase ufune ukwazi izimpendulo ezilandelayo. Ingabe wahlanganyela ocansini ngokumelene nentando yakhe? Ingabe wayengazi kahle ukwenza isinqumo? Ngabe wayesezikhathi futhi engafuni ukwenza ucansi kodwa wenza kanjalo? Kuyini "ukudlwengulwa komhla"? Uyakwazi yini ukuthi "Cha!" Ngoba ukukhubazeka kwakhe kungamvumeli ukuba ahambe noma akhulume? Uma owesifazane ehamba nendoda enxusa kakhulu futhi engashiyi eceleni kwakhe, lokho ngokwayo kuyinkomba yokuhlonza ukuthi ukuhlukumeza kungenzeka. Uma kunzima ukukhuluma noma ukuzwa, ukuhlinzeka ngemisebenzi kufanele kuthathe isinyathelo esengeziwe sokufunda ngokuqondile kowesifazane okwenzekile.




Ukulwa Nokuhlukunyezwa


Ngokusho kukaNora J. Balderian noBarbara Faye Waxman, ababhalise ama-Recommendations Rape Treatment kubantu abakhubazekile, abantu abakhubazekile basengozini yokuhlaselwa ngokocansi. Ziyabonakala njengokudla okulula futhi ezingakwazi ukulwa nazo. Khumbula, ukuhlukunyezwa okuningi ngokocansi kuqhutshwa ekhaya ngabantu ababaziwayo. Lokhu akukwenzi ukuhlaselwa kwanoma yikuphi ubugebengu obuphansi. Umuntu odlwengulwa kumele asebenzise isahlulelo sakhe sokuthi uzohamba kanjani. Ukulwa emuva kungase kube isu eliphumelelayo ekugwemeni ukudlwengula. Ngezinye izikhathi kuyasiza kakhulu ukuhlala uzolile. Usuku lokudlwengula lungenzeka uma umenzi wobugebengu engakunaki isisulu esithi, "Cha". Akulula ukubalekela kumdlwenguli uma ezimisele ukudlwengula. Abantu abakhubazekile banenkinga enzima ukuhamba. "Singaba nesiphambeko somuntu ocansini nomuntu ohlukumezayo noma ocansini uma singafuni ukuthi kubhekwe njengokujwayelekile." "Ukuziphatha ngokocansi kithi njengabesifazane abakhubazekile kuvame ukudideka." Kusho i-D.A.W.N. (IToronto, Canada). "Noma kunjalo, abaningi bethu behlukunyezwa ngokocansi, behlukumezekile, badlwengulwa ..." Njengokubetheka, ukusondelana kobudlelwane phakathi komhlukumezi nomdlwenguli, cishe ngeke kube ukutshela iziphathimandla ukuthi kwenzekani. Ngisho noma kunezinyathelo ezikhethekile "zokuhlukunyezwa ngokocansi" eBoston nakwamanye amadolobha angathintelwa izikhalazo zokuqala lapho owesifazane edlwenguliwe, kusabunzima ukuthola usizo. Abangu-39% kuphela kulabo abadlwenguliwe babika amaphoyisa emaphoyiseni. Kunzima ukuchaza ukuhlaselwa lapho owesifazane eyazi umdlwenguli futhi ngokuvamile lokhu kwenzeka. Ukudlwengulwa kwe-Stranger yiyona esetshenziswe njalo. Kuwesifazane onesifo sokukhubazeka, ukuvimbela okujwayelekile mayelana nokudlwengula okubikwa yilungu lomndeni kungase kuhlanganiswe ubunzima bokuhamba noma ukukhulumisana kanye / noma ukuxhomeka kumxhaphazi ukuze uthole usizo. Kubalulekile ukuba uzilungiselele. Izindlela zokuzivikela zingashintshwa kwabesifazane abakhubazekile. Isibonelo, owesifazane onesihlalo sabakhubazekile angase afunde ukusebenzisa isihlalo sakhe njengesikhali ngokumelene nomhlaseli. Uma unokukhubazeka futhi unesithakazelo ekusizeni ekutholeni i-oda lokuvimbela okwesikhashana noma ukuthola izinsiza zokufunda ezikwazi ukuzivikela, xhumana neBoston Self-Help 617-277-0080.




Ukuhlukumeza kwenzeka. Ungayinaki.


Umqondo "wokulondoloza ubunye bomndeni" usetshenziselwe ukuqhubeka nokuphika owesifazane ukushaya. Ngaphansi komqondo ongaqondakali wokuthi ukulondolozwa kweyunithi yomndeni kungumphumela omuhle kakhulu, labo ababengase basize baye bahluleka ukuthatha isinyathelo kaningi. Idatha iyashisa. Abalingani babo besilisa babulala isigamu sabo bonke abesifazane ababulawa eMassachusetts. Uma owesifazane ekutshela ukuthi uhlaselwa, kholwani, Kunzima ngokwanele ukuba avume yena nabanye ukuthi ushaywe, futhi kunzima nakakhulu lapho labo abavuma khona ngokungabaza. Uma ungumhlinzeki wesevisi, qaphela izimpawu zokuhlukumeza kanye nezinsiza ezitholakalayo zokusiza abesifazane abahlukunyeziwe ukuba babalekele.




Ukusebenzisa imithi njengendlela yokuhlukunyezwa


AbaNakekeli Bokunakekelwa Kwabanye baye babaziwa nangaphezu kwezidakamizwa abakhubazekile noma abantu asebekhulile abakhonzayo. Futhi, abanye abantu abakhubazekile badlwengulwa ngenkathi ngaphansi kwemiphumela yezidakamizwa. Inkinga yokusebenzisa izidakamizwa njengethuluzi lokushaya ngokocansi akuyona into entsha kubantu abakhubazekile. Ukuhlukunyezwa ngokocansi okuhlobene nemithi kuyinkinga kubo bonke abesifazane. "Ukukhathazeka bekulokhu kusetshenziswe kabi nge-benzodiazepine futhi ikakhulukazi ku-Rohpnol, isenzo esinamandla sokudambisa, esingesiwo umthetho osetshenziswayo e-USA. Lezi zidakamizwa ziye zahliswa iziphuzo zesisulu ngabantu abazishaya kamuva. Ngenxa yokuthi imiphumela yezidakamizwa yenza kube nzima kumuntu oye wahlaselwa ukukhumbula okwenzekile, kungenzeka abe nenkinga edidekile yokutshela abanye. "





ABOUT US

Finex House is shelter for battered women and their children; especially those who have disabilities and/or women who are trafficked. Our mission is to provide shelter and services for all battered women, especially those who have dropped through the cracks of existing service providers.

ADDRESS

Finex House
PO Box 300670

Jamaica Plain, MA 02130
24-HR Hotline: 617-288-1054

Office: 617-436-2002
Fax 617-287-0553
finex@finexhouse.org

Finex House Boston
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